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Against “Meeting People Where They Are”
Posted in: Christianity,Eschatology,General by Tom Beaudoin on June 3, 2012
When I started writing about theology and popular culture about fifteen years ago, I quickly discovered one phrase that, above all others, is called on to explain the pastoral rationale for churches or other religious communities engaging with popular culture: so as “to meet people where they are.” This is a pastoral translation of something like a theologically “correlational” approach to ministry. By “correlational” in academic theology, we mean an approach that tries to connect, or “correlate,” something significant from life (here, popular music) with something significant from faith (for example, a religious concept or biblical text).
This is what is understood as a “liberal” theological approach, and one that has been dominant or at least highly influential in pastoral circles in mainline Protestantism and in Roman Catholicism for nearly half a century. I probably used the “meet people where they are” phrase for a while, but pretty quickly I grew uncomfortable with it. Why? Because the men (and occasional women) with whom I was playing in bands did not generally want or need to be “met where they were,” and neither did many of my other friends for whom “secular” or “popular” music was an important part of their lives.
Once you try to explain that phrase to someone who is actually going to be “met where they are,” it becomes clear how paternalistic it can be. It suggests that the pastoral worker needs to come down from their basically settled position, and presumably later return to it, in between which they deign to reach out to those who are not on the normative perch.
Better phrased, it might go something like this: “Be willing to be met where we are,” which suggests the contingent and unfinished work of the pastoral worker’s identity, and the need of the pastoral worker for relationships with others, not
because they are potential reproductions of the pastoral worker’s religion, but because they potentially share, with the pastoral worker, a quest for what is true, for how to live.
Maybe, then, an even better revision of the phrase would be: “Meeting people where neither of us are,” to signify that a true “meeting” will open up something beyond whether either person started. This is essentially the position defended in the recent excellent book by theologian Marion Grau, Rethinking Mission in the Postcolony (T&T Clark, 2011), about which perhaps I will have more to write here at R&T.
As rockish accompaniment to this reflection, here is Mother’s Finest with “Truth’ll Set You Free.”
Tommy Beaudoin, Hastings-on-Hudson, New York
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Tommy,
Thank you for this excellent post. I too have felt uncomfortable with the “meeting people where they are” mantra for quite some time–along with the related Jesuit phrase “go in their door and bring them out yours.” Your explanation resonates with my discomfort–it is an elitist, paternalistic approach, as well-meaning as it may be intended. We might do well to just “meet people” without any ministerial goal (or any kind of goal) in mind. Perhaps “meet and appreciate people”.
Comment by Dave Nantais — June 4, 2012 @ 9:13 am
I hear other Chaplains talk about meeting their Soldiers where they are at and I always thought it was a strange comment. Being LDS, I had never heard that before becoming a Chaplain and working with other faiths. I also would agree that ‘metting people’ is a better approach to being with God’s children than somehow pulling ourselves off of our high-horse and stooping to the level of others. I am not sure Christ ever used this term, he simply was with the people. V/R Troy – From Afghanistan
Comment by Troy Allan — June 5, 2012 @ 9:40 am
Tom,
Thanks for the useful insight about the difficulties associated with phrases like “meeting people where they are.” The point is well taken.
As Father’s Day approaches, however, let me ask a friendly question about portraqying such approaches as “paternalistic.” I would prefer not to paint all fathers with the same brush and would prefer it if we could find another time which identifies the point of view without stigmatizing those of us who are all too aware that we do not “know best.”
Comment by fred herron — June 6, 2012 @ 9:06 am
Fred, from one father to another, thank you for that rejoinder and the reminder that paternalism can mean many things, and I’ll think about alternatives.
tb
Comment by Tommy Beaudoin — June 6, 2012 @ 10:55 am
I am a former teacher of children. “Meeting people where they are” for me is exactly those words. As a teacher and not a member of a hierarchy the phrase, for me, describes a horizontal approach, meeting someone on the road, on their path, on the place their path and mine intersect.. We both have something to offer and something to learn. I see that phrase as my attempt to being open to teaching and learning. Sometimes I was successful other times I was not. peace.
Comment by Linda — September 4, 2012 @ 8:40 pm