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June 2011
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You’re a Friend of Mine

Posted in: General by David Nantais on June 20, 2011

Thank you very much to my R&T colleague Mary McDonough for her recent post about Clarence Clemons–I am so grateful that she chose to showcase the sax solo in “Jungleland”–one of the most transcendent 3+ minutes in rock and roll ever.

The Big Man’s death got me thinking about his important role, not only in the E Street Band, but in Bruce Springsteen’s life. Theirs was an amazing and sacred friendship. They truly loved each other. The New York Times article/obituary from Sunday told the story of the first meeting between Clemons and Springsteen:
“‘I swear I will never forget that moment,’ Mr. Clemons later recalled in an interview. ‘I felt like I was supposed to be there. It was a magical moment. He looked at me, and I looked at him, and we fell in love. And that’s still there.’”

What is it about rock and roll that encourages some men to exhibit an affection toward other men that in any other context would be almost taboo in our culture? It is a wonderful freedom that rock and roll affords to men. In my almost 30 years of attending rock concerts I have seen men in the audience hug one another, give high-fives to strangers, and tousle each others’ hair. I’ve done these things myself, and have felt no self-consciousness about it whatsoever. 

There are homophobic elements in our society that prevent men from sharing their feelings with each other, but Springsteen and Clemons never allowed these elements to prevent them from being affectionate.  On stage these two men hugged, kissed, and verbally expressed their love for each other. What a great example of male friendship, love and affection.

In my book, Rock-A My Soul, I shared a story about 3 close friends of mine who meet every couple of months to embark on a ritual we’ve termed, “The Listening Room.” Each session focuses on a different musical theme–for example, best guitar solos, guilty pleasures, or best fade out. The 4 of us choose 5 songs each and play them for the group. Before we play each song we give an introduction and explain why we chose this particular song and what it means to us. I’ve found that these introductions are opportunities for us to share emotions and personal stories that would otherwise get lost in our banter about sports or politics. The rock music creates a space where it is perfectly acceptable to express these feelings and share our personal stories.

There is much more that could (and should) be written about this topic. Hopefully I can return to it in future posts–and I hope that R&T readers will chime in with their comments.

Here is the Big Man with another friend of his, Jackson Browne

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